June's Journal

Little Things

June Chiang — Sun, 29 Jan 2012 07:44:12 +0000

Today’s sermon spoke about Andrew, one of Jesus’ disciple. Andrew was the apostle of little things. This sermon just led me to think about what I shared with Molly yesterday. I was telling Molly about my conversation with Mr. Afif. I agree that in order to be successful in the real world, there is a need to be recognized for the things that I do.
Molly then asked me what I think God wants of me. I thought about it for a while & what came to mind was Luke 16:10. I realized that I’m a person who is rather impatient. I do not bother building a strong foundation but rather, once I think I know the basics, I’ll move on. In other words, I start to walk, even before I’ve learnt to crawl.
Luke 16:10 teaches me the opposite. There is a reason why I’m doing all the basic things now. & it’s because God wants me to build a strong foundation, before giving me larger things in life to accomplish. Indeed many times in life, people, including me would take thee little things for granted & that is why people aim to do things that will put them in the limelight, so as to gain recognition. However, I must bear in mind that regardless of what I do, it is all done, for God & no one else. & He will honor me, so long as I play my part.

Cultivating Relationship

June Chiang — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 07:54:31 +0000

Today Molly shared that relationships are meant to be cultivated. To grow plants, it must be watered, fertilized & taken care of. When there are weeds, they must be rid of. Occasional pruning is also done. Relationships are akin to plants. There is the effort to be put in, for the relationship to grow & flower. It takes a lot of time on the gardener’s part to take care of the plant. This reminded me of Tabby, who took the time to take care of me, the little plant. However, despite all the effort she placed, this plant just couldn’t produce good flowers & fruits. She has placed much effort & time, but it was futile.
Relationship is really a tricky topic to handle & it really takes a lot to excel in it. After undergoing sessions with Molly, I’ve learnt some methods on how to handle relationships & am slowly putting them into practice. I’ll start slow & progress!

Complain & Whining

June Chiang — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 08:18:35 +0000

Tabby always say that I’m complaining/whining about everything & anything. I seriously don’t know what her definition of that means. Sometimes, I’m only just talking about things but in her eyes, I’m simply complaining/whining. I’ve been trying hard to change but I really don’t know what does Tabby want from me. Every time I change, without any encouragement from Tabby, I find it so tough. I want to give up changing & just remain as myself, but I know that ultimately I’ll benefit also, when I change for the better. I just pray hard to God that I can be changed from within.

A Candid Talk

June Chiang — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 04:10:39 +0000

Met Mr. Afif today to record my further statement. After we were done, we actually had a candid talk, to my surprise. He actually told me that if I want to stay on longer where I am, I must find opportunities to stand out, so as to be noticed. There’s a large pool of staff & competition is tough. Therefore, to stand out, I must be able to spot opportunities & fight for them. I should do stuff that will make me be in the limelight & not always do the back-end jobs because in the end, I can work so hard but no one will recognize what I did.
He also shared that I should never be scared of taking up more jobs. Whenever more work comes my way, I should just embrace it. Because at the end of it, it just means OT for a while, but after that, it’ll be over.
In addition, I should never clash against the top management & just accept what they say & do it. I should also speak out if I have good ideas so as to be noticed positively.
As I left his room, I thought about this conversation. Definitely it happened, not by coincidence. What is God trying to tell me? As I think about it now, I believe that He wants me to change my work attitude. Sure, I’m fine with doing back-end jobs, but I should stand up to the challenges & instead handle subjects, when possible. I must also bear in mind that God is my ultimate Boss, & not anyone else. Although there will be people who slack or cut corners, I’m accountable for my own life, to God. I can’t say that just because Person A did so, I followed likewise. If so, then I’ll be accorded the same judgement as Person A.

Prepared for Trials?

June Chiang — Sun, 15 Jan 2012 07:30:55 +0000

An interesting story was shared today in church. It goes as follows:
One day, a farmer set a mouse-trap outside a mouse-hole in his house. When the mouse saw the mouse-trap, he ran out of his emergency exit into the farm. When he saw the hen, he sought assistance from the hen. However, the hen told him that it wasn’t her problem & declined assistance. The mouse continued running & he saw the pig next. He sought help from the pig but the pig also replied that it was his own problem & he should solve it himself. This whole scenario was repeated when the mouse saw the cow. Later that night, there was a loud scream in the house. The farmer’s wife went to check the source of the noise out & was bitten by a snake that was caught in the mouse-trap. The farmer immediately sent his wife to the hospital but the wife returned home still ill. The farmer then slaughtered the hen to make chicken soup for the wife, but she still remained ill. The neighbors came to visit the farmer’s wife & the farmer then slaughtered the pig to entertain the guests. However, the farmer’s wife remained ill & soon passed away. The farmer then slaughtered the cow to serve those who were at the wake.
Upon hearing this story, I see myself as the hen/pig/cow. When others are in trouble, I tend to not offer practical assistance, unless that person means something to me. But who knows, someone else’s trouble might be linked to me indirectly also.
It isn’t easy for someone to approach others when in need. As a friend, if someone approaches me, it would mean that the someone trust me enough to share the problems & believe that I can solve it. As an acquaintance, it would mean at least that the person has humbled himself to have approach me. As such, at this point, I should ask myself WWJD instead of reacting like how the hen/pig/cow reacted. I know that if I want to change to be more Christ-like, there’ll be much challenges up ahead to put me through the trial. Am I prepared for them?

Blessings

June Chiang — Fri, 13 Jan 2012 15:35:44 +0000

Was at Redhill Moral Seniors Activity Centre today to distribute items today to old folks living in 1-room flats. When I had gone to a household together with Clare, there was an old man who was assisted with a walker. When Clare knocked on his door, he was so eager to open the door to receive his bag of items, to the extend that Clare had to keep telling him to walk slowly.
After we had accomplished our mission, I joined Eunice & Clare in their conversation. I overheard Clare sharing with Eunice that it was an eye-opener for her today. I thought to myself how come I didn’t have any feelings this time. I remembered the 1st time I had the opportunity to do this was when I joined PR1C on 25 December 2009 when they distributed toiletries to 1-room flats too. At that time, I remembered feeling sorry for these people. 1 of the main reasons why I had signed up for the India Mission Trip was also because I knew that we could visit slums & during the trip, I also had the same feeling & was thankful for my life in Singapore. Have I become numb already? I do hope that it’s because I’ve not slept well due to the long day yesterday that resulted in my lack of feelings today. Because I certainly don’t want to be numb!
Had the OL Zonal kickoff & I received a gift from James & MK. They had gotten the devotional that was being sold in church: “The One Year At His Feet Devotional: 365 Daily Readings to Instruct, Strengthen, Encourage, and Challenge Your Walk with Jesus” for me. Although 13 days have passed, I’ll put this devotional into good use for 2012! I am also aiming to build stronger relationships with my cell members, beginning from this year!

A Gentle Reminder

June Chiang — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 13:18:06 +0000

There are just some people who irritates me, regardless of what. Fortunately, I’m not the only person who would find them irritating. To be honest, I thank God that I’ve colleagues who go through the same ‘suffering’ as me, having to endure the same nonsense, & from there, we all encourage each other to just tolerate.
Take for example, today I was complaining to Eugene & of all people, he actually reminded me to behave more like Jesus. He even said it’s useless if I were to go church every week, but do not practice what I hear. It did silent me for a moment because he was right. I’ve forgotten to ask myself the question “WWJD” whenever I’m placed in difficult situations.

Hidden Sins?

June Chiang — Sat, 07 Jan 2012 05:53:18 +0000

Didn’t manage to sleep well on Thursday morning & this morning. I remembered telling Tabby on Thursday that I had woke up early that morning, & she reminded me that sometimes when we are awaken in the wee hours, it may be God’s way of communicating with us & so I should ask God what He wants to tell me.
This morning, I woke up very early again. It led me to think, am I lacking of sleep because of my sins lately? As I did my QT later on in the morning, it spoke about how sins can never be hidden, but will eventually catch up with us one day.
I need to consciously stop myself from sinning, but rather do the things that will make God proud of me. God knows of every sin I’ve done. If I want to draw near to Him, how can I still sin? Many times, I fall into the temptation but I don’t think I pray for strength to overcome the temptation. Tabby is right — I depend on myself to do things. To stop sinning, I’ve to depend on God for the strength!

Start of 2012

June Chiang — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 06:46:28 +0000

As I enter 2012, I decided that I shall start a journal. May this journal encourage me as I continue my journey with God.
In this new year, I aim to draw closer to God & cultivate a thankful heart. I want to learn how to give thanks in ALL circumstances. Especially now, when things are not going well between Tabby & me, I will choose to give thanks to God for putting me through this trial & at the end of it, I will learn something. I do also want to be more mature & to have a humble attitude at work, & to learn all that I can while I complete the remaining 1 year of my bond.